Log Three- Reader Two: The Reflective Practioner

So I'm not exactly sure where to begin with this entry. As usual I've had a lot of different jobs during these last couple of weeks, which explains the delay in this entry.
One thing that has just come and gone was Toronto Fashion Week. It was something I've lately been longing to be a part of. Unfortunately this year they have strictly said ONLY agency models can be a part of the shows which made things extremely difficult for me obviously being a freelance model. It made me realise despite the fact I have done very well for myself there are still many closed doors for me. For some reason being with an agency gives you more entitlement and credentials rather than years of experience. I am also vulnerable still to people scamming me out of more money that I deserved from jobs. At the same time, the issues with signing onto an agency is they could be scam artists themselves, they may not be getting in enough castings, they may just put you into one category of modeling when I want to do it all and also the fact they cannot actually get you the jobs, they can only get you the castings. I have started agency shopping but it has not been easy. I've sent emails to agencies with either no response or saying they were not interested. I've also gone to see agencies, two of which were interested but I've had some bad reviews on them. I also had one agency tell they weren't interested and leave within five seconds of myself arriving at their office. There have been positives though from these last couple of weeks. I've had confirmation from the photographer from the hair shoot that he is submitting still the pictures to hair magazines. The shoot Tara Wright, Stephen Loban, Linda Pazic, Lisa Jackson and myself has gained interest from W25 Magazine, asking for all the hi-res from the shoot. I also participated in a photo shoot yesterday for designer Arnaldo Santos with his dresses and a new online magazine for Fabulous PR. I also modeled for friend and fabulous knitwear designer Dylan which you can see on his website www.dylaniumknits.com. Here is just a few of my favourites from his site...

So even though I've had some pretty negative moments especially with the agencies. From this experience and others in my past I've learned to not give up so easily. Whether it is the fashion industry or performing arts industry, I find both can be equally brutal and pretty self esteem destroying. But you need to keep going if you really want to be successful in what you do, because even if everything seems hopeless things will work out in the end. I've also seen in my many years of doing the modeling and the performing, people giving up the minute things don't go right I guess expecting things to come easily and always be smooth sailing, especially when you have made a pretty strong resume for yourself. But it will always be tough and you must persevere no matter how bad it gets.

The bad experiences have also made me even more determined to crack this industry. I've just signed up for a competition where I could win a front cover shoot with Wowza Magazine which is this fantastic high fashion but alternative magazine. My model friend, Dalia has been lucky enough to appear in their pages already. In order for me to win my photo, on their Facebook page that I uploaded, it needs to have the most "likes" by December 1st. It's been pretty competitive so far but I have been really determined and asking for as much help as I can. People have been  really fantastic so far and this has helped me reach out to more networks and connections. I've also really got my face out there to others. If any of you would like to help out here is the link to the photo Victoria's front cover photo on Facebook, just simply click "like" on the photo and share with others. I really hope I can win, it would be such an amazing opportunity and another job I can add to my ever growing resume. Like I said, I am even more determined now than ever and will not allow the bad experiences to effect me.